After praying about it many times, I realized that I might be the only one in this friend’s life today who is making an effort to see his spiritual goodness, to notice and appreciate the real man that God made. I wanted him to know that someone out there believes in him and why.

Although I felt it was wise to step back somewhat from our regular interaction, before doing so I told him that I would always see him the way God does. I spelled out for him all of the wonderful spiritual qualities that he expresses and explained that he is that way because God gave him the ability to be like that, and that nothing could ever take it away. He listened; I mean, who talks likes that, you know? It got his attention. And every day I think of him as I said I would.

Sometimes being wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove (Matthew 10:16) includes setting boundaries in a relationship that feels unbalanced or potentially dangerous.

I have a friend who spent half his life in prison, lives on the street a lot, will take the mile if given the inch, and present himself how he thinks someone wants him to be, even lying to do so. When I caught onto this manipulation, I confronted him directly, made it clear that I would always be honest with him because I cared about him. I also made it clear that if he could do that too, we’d have the basis of a relationship.  If that didn’t work for him then we wouldn’t  have one. For the most part, that initial directness has paid off and now years later, when all others have written him off, we still have a friendship.   I know he does his best to be as honest with me as he’s being with himself and he thinks of me as someone who has his best interest at heart and who he can count on.  There have been times when I’ve refused to be in contact with him when he was living dangerously, and he knew it was because I care too much to watch him teeter willingly on a cliff.  I’d tell him straight that when he stopped he could call me again.

I’m not intending to compare my friend with yours :), but just to say, I’ve found over the years that the statement in Science and Health (453:16) holds true – “Honesty is spiritual power”.  Start there.

Thank you for your humility to ask.

Questions unite, statements oppose.

In answer to your question with regards to your friend’s.

Love, love , love your way through it, that is what does the healing Love, it eradicates erroneous thoughts and reveals the true man.

Have no truck with mortal mind.

Love in Christ

Peter Reichl-Cunningham